This week, I am tied up with exam revisions with my daughter and son. It is more like me sitting for the exams. That explains for the long period of my not blogging.
Yeah! Today is the last day of exams, and it also means Papa and Mummy merdeka also. Well, there is a lot that I learned from this past one week, not mugging for the exams, but it terms of parenting. Well, we learn all the time, don't we? And sometimes, I think parenting theory probably can be applied at workplace for managing colleagues, bosses etc. Ha!
First, patience is golden, not silence. Kids temperamental varies, and when it comes to the mood, sometimes she may be in a mood for learning, sometimes, she just plain shut off, so we as parents have to be patient. Even when she throws a tantrum, we have to look at things from another perspective, put ourselves in her shoes, is she too tired, does she need a break? When she makes a mistake, we have to repeatedly explain. (Trust me, it is not easy, esp. when my daughter is just out of sync, and do not want to listen). Isn’t this familiar, at your workplace too? Don’t you have staffs, that need constant reminders too, but still make mistakes all over again?
Sometimes, we need to listen to them more. You will be surprise sometimes, what they think/say actually make sense. “Mummy, teacher only let us answer these by choosing the A, B, or C.” It suddenly occurred to me, that she is right, I have been letting her practice on workbooks that probably have higher standards than required – she just needs to answer the objective answers, instead of writing answers in sentences.
Creativeness also plays a part in making parenting less stressful. Maybe instead of the usual reading and writing, we can make learning more fun by thinking up other activities. My kids enjoy scribbling on the white board. At home, we have a white board which they can write their spellings or put their artistic talent to play. This takes off some pressure from the actual learning. Instead of memorizing multiplication tables, we have them in songs which they can hum even when in the car.
When my daughter is having one of her temper, she often loses herself. Sometimes, she screams, or cry , bargaining for less worksheets to do etc. The important thing for a parent to do in such situation is to immediately cool down, take deep breath. I often send her off to cool down (take a stroll around the house, jump on the I-bouncer, face the wall and have some time-off, or take a bath). This serves as a cooling period for me too. And when she is back, she is often better. Then, I will reason with her. Sometimes, she is able to accept my explanations.
Scheduling is important. As my daughter has a jugdging character, she likes to be told her revision schedule, eg. 2 hours of revision and after that it is TV time. If she doesn’t cooperate and we runs off the schedule, her TV time is automatically taken off. If all’s well, a promise is a promise, give her some time in front of the square box!
Just as adult like to receive their annual increment/ bonus during performance appraisals, children also get motivated when we occasionally give them a pet on the back, and tell them “good job done, great effort etc.” Rewards must be measurable, specific, timely and fair. My kids have a weekly star collecting chart which papa promises a KFC meal for good behaviour, or a favourite princess/ooh notebook. A word of caution, the novelty of these rewards can wear off pretty fast and become non-effective, so we have to always think of some other ideas.
Yeah! Today is the last day of exams, and it also means Papa and Mummy merdeka also. Well, there is a lot that I learned from this past one week, not mugging for the exams, but it terms of parenting. Well, we learn all the time, don't we? And sometimes, I think parenting theory probably can be applied at workplace for managing colleagues, bosses etc. Ha!
First, patience is golden, not silence. Kids temperamental varies, and when it comes to the mood, sometimes she may be in a mood for learning, sometimes, she just plain shut off, so we as parents have to be patient. Even when she throws a tantrum, we have to look at things from another perspective, put ourselves in her shoes, is she too tired, does she need a break? When she makes a mistake, we have to repeatedly explain. (Trust me, it is not easy, esp. when my daughter is just out of sync, and do not want to listen). Isn’t this familiar, at your workplace too? Don’t you have staffs, that need constant reminders too, but still make mistakes all over again?
Sometimes, we need to listen to them more. You will be surprise sometimes, what they think/say actually make sense. “Mummy, teacher only let us answer these by choosing the A, B, or C.” It suddenly occurred to me, that she is right, I have been letting her practice on workbooks that probably have higher standards than required – she just needs to answer the objective answers, instead of writing answers in sentences.
Creativeness also plays a part in making parenting less stressful. Maybe instead of the usual reading and writing, we can make learning more fun by thinking up other activities. My kids enjoy scribbling on the white board. At home, we have a white board which they can write their spellings or put their artistic talent to play. This takes off some pressure from the actual learning. Instead of memorizing multiplication tables, we have them in songs which they can hum even when in the car.
When my daughter is having one of her temper, she often loses herself. Sometimes, she screams, or cry , bargaining for less worksheets to do etc. The important thing for a parent to do in such situation is to immediately cool down, take deep breath. I often send her off to cool down (take a stroll around the house, jump on the I-bouncer, face the wall and have some time-off, or take a bath). This serves as a cooling period for me too. And when she is back, she is often better. Then, I will reason with her. Sometimes, she is able to accept my explanations.
Scheduling is important. As my daughter has a jugdging character, she likes to be told her revision schedule, eg. 2 hours of revision and after that it is TV time. If she doesn’t cooperate and we runs off the schedule, her TV time is automatically taken off. If all’s well, a promise is a promise, give her some time in front of the square box!
Just as adult like to receive their annual increment/ bonus during performance appraisals, children also get motivated when we occasionally give them a pet on the back, and tell them “good job done, great effort etc.” Rewards must be measurable, specific, timely and fair. My kids have a weekly star collecting chart which papa promises a KFC meal for good behaviour, or a favourite princess/ooh notebook. A word of caution, the novelty of these rewards can wear off pretty fast and become non-effective, so we have to always think of some other ideas.
So, happy parenting!
2 comments:
Totally agree with you. Parenting skills can really be practised in the workplace. Haha. Plus parents are good at multitasking too. My girl is also having her tests and we also use the whiteboard at home. Sometimes she finds it such a novelty writing on the whiteboard that she learns without realising that she is learning. lol.
Thanks for the comments.
I am new at blogging, I visit your blog some times. You write interesting parenting stuffs too.
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